Friday, September 10, 2010

I'm Just Not That Girl!

Ive always said that "I'm just not that girl"... not the girl who counts calories, not the girl to  deny myself the extra treat in the name of being skinny, not the girl that takes a class at the gym then goes and puts in a few miles on the treadmill... NOPE that's just not me.  No! I'm the girl that has slowly crept up to a size 16, the girl that is no longer comfortable in my bathing suit, the girl that HATES to see pictures of myself.  But that does not feel like ME either....

In many ways I feel like I am in the midst of an identity crisis!  My old way of life is no longer working for me.  The proof is in the pudding or perhaps more appropriately I should say the proof is in the pooch in my tummy.  As a result, I have had to create my own paradigm shift.  No, I don't want to be the calorie obsessed gym rat that can't find joy in life for fear of gaining a pound, but neither do I want to be the heavy girl that is steadily gaining and is unhappy her skin.  Surely there has to be a balance.  Surely I can find a happy medium somehow. 

This journey of Getting-to-10 is about finding and living that balance.  Today is my weekly weigh in and I lost 1.6 pounds.  I didn't get to workout everyday as I would have liked. I enjoyed Labor Day festivities that included lots of eating but I was still able to lose weight.  Why?  Because I was mindful about my choices.  No matter what your current status is, we are where we are in life because of the choices that we have made.  Don't like where you are??? Start today making different choices.  If nothing changes... nothing changes.  Maybe "that girl" knows that it is better to make good choices on the front end then to lament the results on the back end.  In some ways maybe that is just the girl that I want to be!!

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